Hey SimplyT,

I can relate to what you're going through. I am also a single mom with one son at the time he was about 13 or 14.  Only he saw me kiss my girlfriend which broke the ice for me. One day which was so unexpected because I always tried to be discreet. I notice he started acting out so I pull him aside, sat him down and we talked and he told me what he saw.  I stress to him that I loved him and tha it would never change anything that we had.  I also told him that  just because I was gay it didn't or wouldn't make him gay. Because I was still married (seperated) in the military and yes still in the closet that we could not discuss this with everyone. He then took it well and life went on.

I'm proud to say he is grown with a wife and a daughter and he still love me.

I think that at that age they know but for sure I would say something if he ask you. I think if you felt free to talk to him he would feel free to talk with you too. Let him know that moms can talk about girl too because we were once a girl.

Hope this helps. Good luck with your soldier...

Ms Dee

hey ladies...im gonna try to make this as brief as possible...i am 40 with a 13yr old son.....i call him my soldier...im an advocate for affirming our males....so i'll steal a bit of ur time edifying  who i call "my soldier".... he's an intelligent, mild mannered, non-responsive, intravert,brilliant in his craft of music and art....cool dude....never having any social/behavior problems.....smooth ride through school so far....(Praise God!)...athletic and HANDSOME...;-)......BUT has only known his mom to date men....3 in his short life to be exact....one being his dad.....i am struggling with how to share with him that tHe woman who he sees as "mommy's good~cool friend" is really mommy's woman/girlfriend.......he's well exposed to varied characteristics/interest of folks via school, shared communications btween these "new kids" and of course a little television...so im certain that he is aware of the gay life....and because my soldier is no fool....im certain that he knows tat my partner i gay.....i really want to discuss somethings with him but dont know how....i despise myself acting s if he isnt cever enouh to know better.....not that she and i do anything i his present that wuld immediately raiseand eyebrow or be considered alarming but....did i mention he is quit intelligent....observant ....so where do i start....do i start....how do i....r there things i should or should not say.....whats necessary to say and whats not....

he already has difficulty sharing with "his mom" speifics or even minimum details about his relatons/iny=terest in girls (thinks that dad talk)....so because w have genrally talked freely about how diffeent people exist in our world but all deserving of respect....its still hard for me to share what has been my testimony to freedom....love....

please share your comments, experiences, advice and/or encouragement....;-)