Musings from a first-timer with Olivia…
My wife and I had the most wonderful vacation of our lives last week. I have been back home for five days, and am just now able to articulate some of my thoughts about our experience. Deb and I (Judi) are 47 years young. I think that almost all heterosexual people, and lots of gay people younger than us, are not aware (or fully aware) of what it means to look up and see the “FEEL FREE” banner flying.
Deb and I have both been blessed, and cursed, to have spent a great deal of our careers in the same workplace. While I love seeing her each day at work, every hint of a relationship must be kept hidden. Out in the streets of our hometown, we can never hold hands, much less kiss or behave romantically. You see, we work for our local government. It is something we believe in strongly. However, we could never be seen in a romantic way – even at night in the Downtown Plaza or at the Hippodrome Theatre. Even though we were always careful, we were still investigated once for the possibility of favoritism after a rumor was spread by an anonymous person. There are a couple of gay nightclubs – but we cannot be seen there either.
We raised two children together (because I was previously married and divorced). So in our experience, we could never be open and free - even within our own home. My children did not except my marriage to Deb for a long time. In addition, my own mother did not allow Deb to come into her home for the first seven years of our relationship. My father still does not know I am gay to this day…
That “Feel Free” banner was our invitation to abandon all of society’s rules for the week and just be in love with each other – completely, passionately, and openly.
The fist two days, it took us about half an hour to remember that we can hold hands after exiting our stateroom. This got better as the week went on. By the sixth day, we had that, “Can we be completely out?” delay down to less than 20 seconds!!
Then on top of that Olivia and Holland America offered us private beaches, ports with no other cruise ships there, AND 800 staff members who are not prejudiced or judgmental. Unbelievable, completely unbelievable. So, once we had experienced what an Olivia cruise is really like, we were deeply saddened to be slapped in the face again with the reality of our regular working lives. I stayed in bed on the Monday after the cruise, barely getting up, and did not even answer my phone. Then I got an email from Olivia. It is offering a discount…
That’s when I realized – it is not about looking backward. It is about looking forward -- to the next one!!!!
Deb and I believe that there are other lesbians out there who have similar stories to tell about this awakening… and we would love to read them!
In the meantime, we want to say Thank You, Olivia. Thank you so very much, Judi