Well, it looks like I got some company on this one. Being alone is never easy but I somehow seem to manage that part. Day to day is always a struggle...but damned those holidays!   They are unforgiving and seem to last forever!!  But I think for me, it's simply just making through them...one day at a time and no deep thinking. That'll just mess me up more and tears don't make for a happy camper. 

I don't know which is worse...Thanksgiving or Christmas. I haven't been back home in almost 20 years. And in all honesty, I don't want too. My brothers are scattered a bit. One's in Indiana; another's either on the east coast or in Ohio. And the last is back home with our parents. Trying to reconnect after all this time has been hard and I wonder if its really worth it. I always felt like an outsider looking in, the older I got. So, I'm 100% on that idea.

But overall, I think I feel the most lost around Christmas. With my grandfather having past away in January of this year, I really have no reason to call home, let alone go there. He made it worth while and now...it's just so empty. I find myself looking at the stop lights and all I see are the "greens and reds" of the holidays, even though I see those lights everyday. How off the wall is that?

Yeah, Christmas is tough by yourself. I guess that's why you can always find a bar open somewhere. Too bad it's always a straight one. I think I'll skip the holidays this year. Maybe, I'll just try sleep through them. And witht hat, I think I better stop there because I'm starting to get bummed out here. 

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I just moved back to Boston so thankfully I have my family to be with.  My biggest challenge is meeting new people... Haven't been here in a long time... or even since I have been out for that matter.  I'm super duper shy  :(  Bummed in Boston

I think the biggest challenge is being alone after having had many holidays as part of a family.  The biggest challenge will be watching the other families be happy and not getting emotional.  I have gone through a recent break up.  It is difficult however, every ending can also be a new beginning.  I am getting through it by staying busy and doing things that I really like to do and allowing myself to go ahead and get emotional.  I think it is important for me to re-learn how to be happy and Ok by myself.

Dawn, I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom.  From some of your previous posts it's clear that you and she shared a very close and special relationship.  I know the holidays will be truly rough without her - it's good that you have your sister and her family to help you thru.   My condolences.

 

Well, it is much harder for me this year.  Being single at the holidays has never been an issue because I had my family, mostly my mom.  This year though, I don't.  I lost my mom to breast cancer Nov 8th.  My sister and her family are my rock now, but nothing equates to having mom.  If I had a partner, maybe I would have someone to lean on during these hard holidays, but alas, it is not so.

It seems like there's a common theme here, spending the holidays alone.  For me it's that as well. I lost the love of my life in a hit and run accident in July and just when I thought I was coping well, here come the holidays. Very difficult.  My biggest challenge this holiday season will be just to make it through. I've got a lot of positive support, but it is still very hard.

My biggest challenge during the holidays I would have to say is spending it alone.  Also if i go to my families for the holidays like Thanksgiving dinner and stuff like that everyone has that "significant other" and i am the only single one there.  Being alone and lonely during the holidays is the challenge for sure. 

Well, my biggest challenge is spending the holidays single.  Out of most of my friends and all my cousins, I am the single one.   It's hard because everyone is doing the 'couple thing' while I am not obviously.  Doesn't help that I'm lesbian because then I get the "Are you sure?" lectures.  Because apparently I should have a woman constantly to make sure I'm sure that I'm lesbian.  According to my family at least.  lol  If only!

I guess for me is spending it alone, I recently informed some of my friends that I am gay and our communication has minimized so it's hard.  My friends are (were) my family so now I'm just lonely but I do my best to keep me busy.  I'm spending time decorating my new place and I am enjoying it.  The good thing is that I will be going on a business trip within 2 weeks so I will be able to sightsee when I'm off from work

Hello all!  Thanks so much for joining this group.  Here's a new topic for discussion:

Since this is the time of 'many holidays' for Americans at least, what is your biggest challenge during this time of year?

I'll start: as a biz owner it's getting that 2008 planning done.  this time of year is also a financial stress.  And, lastly, it's transforming out of spending the holidays doing what i feel 'obligated' to do vs. moving into spending more of my holidays doing what i want to do.  i know this might seem self-centerd, but, when your family doesn't seem to care if you are at a celebration or not, you start to re-evaluate how you are spending your time/energy/$, etc.

on the plus side - i am getting more comfortable spending the holidays single.  this will be my 4th holiday in a row that way!    

and you?  let's get the discussion going! 

Barb
http://www.coachsappho.com/giftpackage.htm